How To Prepare Your Home For Foster Care
August 8, 2018
How To Help A Foster Child Transition Back To School
August 22, 2018
Choosing to foster a child requires mental and physical preparation. With that said, you probably already possess many of the skills needed to successfully foster a child. Read on to learn seven skills you need to master before becoming a foster parent, to see if you have what it takes.
Open-Mindedness
Inviting a child into your home means inviting their past as well. You don’t know what prior experiences with foster care they have had, or what expectations they have of you. It’s important to be open-minded, so that you are mentally prepared for any unexpected behaviors or reactions.
Communication Skills
Learn as much as you can about the child from your foster services center before meeting them. Remember that there will be professionals involved to help both you and the child along the way. Be open to communicating with caseworkers, therapists, or doctors as needed. Along with communicating, welcome guidance and support from the professional adults in your foster child’s life.
Prepare To Be A Role-Model
Your foster child may not have had the best adult role models in their life. Remember that you must lead by example. Reflect on your speech within the home. Are you non-judgmental and non-discriminatory? Do you use a calm and collected tone? Your foster child has the opportunity to see how a responsible adult operates. Set a healthy standard of care to promote their education, extracurricular activities, and overall wellbeing.
Creating Boundaries
Foster children are prone to push boundaries when they first move to their new home. Similar to parenting any existing children within the family, you must set firm boundaries, rules and expectations when the child first arrives. Teaching them that there are repercussions for their actions helps them to learn responsibility — and to someday become responsible adults themselves.
Resiliency
While you don’t want to put up a wall to your foster child, it’s important to thicken up your skin. Your foster child may find ways to push your buttons or may be prone to emotional outbursts. Remind yourself that they aren’t mad at you, they are mad at their situation. Prepare yourself for coping with the extreme without becoming hurt or angry. Learn to let negative comments roll off your back.
Patience
Most of the issues that come during fostering can be solved with patience. Remind yourself not to become caught up in a debate in the middle of a heated moment. Practice breathing exercises to help you calm down if you are prone to fast reactions. When your foster child has a rough day, remind yourself that tomorrow will be better.
Kindness
While it’s important to set clear boundaries, it’s also important to show kindness. Your foster child may have experienced abuse or trauma. You may be the first kind adult they have met in their lives. When they make a mistake, give them a chance to say sorry and move on. Kindness will help to foster a stronger connection between you and the foster child, adding to the experience for both parties.
Deciding to open your home to a foster child is a big decision. Take time to practice these skills so that you can be mentally and emotionally prepared for the journey ahead. Reframe your thinking to put your foster child’s needs first while balancing a healthy home for the whole family.
Every child needs and deserves to grow up safe and protected from abuse and neglect, and caring foster parents offer children support and stability when they need it most. At Camelot Care Centers, we specialize in higher-level foster care for children and adolescents that need extra support. We partner with our foster parents/homes to provide trauma informed care and additional services, including in-home counseling, parent support and training, tele-psychiatry, and therapeutic mentoring, to maintain children at the least restrictive, yet most appropriate level of care. Camelot Care Centers (“Camelot”) is a Child Welfare Agency licensed by the State of Illinois, a member of the Illinois Collaboration on Youth (ICOY), and is accredited by the Council on Accreditation (COA).
